Well so much has happened this week, that is both interesting and funny that it's hard to exclude any of the events of the week. I'll try and stick to the things that will hopefully offer everybody an insight into working in a Vietnamese hospital. Firstly, below is the Hospital... 
Lunch was very kindly provided by staff members, for me for the first 2 days, but it was the after lunch activity that almost had me questioning my decision to take the job! So after a nice 'take-out' style rice, chicken, veg etc... I was ushered to the main room, where already there were three women (staff members) lay on the plinths, (a place where a patient lies on to receive treatment), covered in sheets sleeping! I was shown to a plinth and told to take a sleep... well, ok, I have been in this situation in stranger's houses here, but not in a work setting, and not on my first day.. so there I found myself sleeping with five female colleagues on my first day of work! Lucky you may think, but I assure you I was just worrying what they would think if the awoke, to found me either snoring or dribbling!!!! (no that I do snore of dribble... I was just thinking there's always a first time!) I was woken by one of the physiotherapists shaking me, and telling me I must return to work! This was quite a surreal moment, as when I was woken, I just saw this unfamiliar face, I couldn't really focus properly as there seemed to be big bright white lights everywhere! I though they might have smuggled me into some kind of strange laboratory! It's certainly one way to get to know your colleagues!!! I'd advocate a 2 hour lunch to anyone!!!!Wednesday I had to present to the department, about my role at the hospital, this proved to be a tricky task, not simply because of the very short notice I had to prepare, but also trying to describe the concepts of Occupational Therapy, via translation, and to a professional audience, of whom some had never heard of my job. I spent as much time trying to find interesting pictures and make culturally acceptable jokes, that would not be 'lost in translation'. I must say my wonderful wonderful translator (Nga), made this process easier, and there was only one point where I found myself quietly chuckling to myself, at on of my funny comments, though no one else in the room had the slightest smile on their face! (My University lecturers told me off about trying to funny in presentations...) here's proof of the event! 
Many of the patients I'm seeing at the hospital are stroke victims, or people who have had motorcycle accidents, and had major trauma. I have already met two women, who were involved in motorcycle accidents, and whose husband/boyfriend died in the accident. It's quite tragic, but with motorcycles the preferred form of transport here, it's not exactly surprising to find this situation. I want to mention just a little about the life of a patient and family member in a hospital here. The building itself is quite nice and clean, but the sight that greets me every morning is one that saddens me. As I have mentioned in previous blogs, here there is no nursing care to provide food, wash and dress the patient, or feed and toilet a patient if required. A family member/friend is expected to do this. So family members must basically live at the hospital, like the patient does. Sometimes the family member may well share the bed with the sick person. The other option is to take some kind of fold up bed, or sleep on waiting area chairs, and this is something I see each morning as I make my way to the rehabilitation department - families of patients sleeping, or just waking up after spending yet another night in the hospital waiting area, (which is not sheltered from the outdoors). I have seen a couple huddled together in a little bed under a stairwell, and it certainly explains the pieces of women's underwear I have seen drying in any of the toilets I have used at the hospital. It really can be a different world here! Oh and don't forget, you pay for your health care and stay in the hospital here!!!
On to more pleasant tales, Saturday afternoon saw young Khoa have his 8th birthday party. His adopted mum had invited us, well actually he probably invited us, he often joins his mum on some of our social outings!!! So we know him pretty well. Some of the other kids from the orphanage joined the rather large gathering at a local restaurant in Hoi An to celebrate. The highlight of the party, apart from the karaoke, and present opening... was the 'pin the tail on the water buffalo' game, though sadly for me adults were not invited to play! here are some of the key highlights of the afternoon!
Oh just one more quick story... as I was trying to explain to some staff at the hospital why we needed to ask a women who only had the use of one arm, what problems she might have whilst trying to dress herself, it became obvious that putting a bra on, would be quite a tough thing to do with one hand. So we had a quick brainstorming session about how this could be achieved, this required some practical demonstration! (Much to the amusement of my new colleagues!) See below...
Ok it's time for sleeping on my hard wooden bed!!!Night
Regards from Vietnam
Dan
Monday and Tuesday were filled with busy days at work and casual drinks after work, Wednesday was the start of the party process as it was my official CHIA (work) leaving party. In true CHIA style the staff took us to a 'street food' cafe, with possibly the smallest plastic chairs I have yet to see in the whole of Vietnam. With my knees closer to my neck then they have been since the day I was born, I began to think that even Snow White's dwarfs would end up with 7 displaced hips after sitting this low for too long! The heavy rains made sure the small makeshift shelter that we sat under was stretched to it's potential.
As we finished our meal, we were joined by Vi, worker from the orphanage, who arrived like a knight in shining armour... I describe her this way not because she was riding a horse or wearing a ridiculous outfit, but because my bicycle front tire was as flat as a Dutch mountain, and Vi let me leave my bicycle at her office before driving me to the main event of the evening- Karaoke. Now my Vietnamese colleagues, as reserved and 'shy' as they can sometimes be, become like 'wanna be pop stars' when they get a chance to grab that microphone and sing their hearts out! We were not disappointed on this occasion as the pictures show... my own renditions of "I'm a Believer" and of course Copacabana got reasonably high scored (deservedly so I thought!)
Friday night turned out to be yet another surprisingly drink filled evening as the volunteers met as per usual at 'Treats' bar, and said further farewells to Julia & Seth (volunteers from the orphanage). After 20 of us managed to wangle some free french fries, as is now customary, myself Seth, Eri and Zoe (niece of Pete - yeah you guessed it - a volunteer) got down to some serious pool playing... well I say serious in terms of the faces we were making as we missed easy shot after easy shot... After excelling at pool, and in time to get another soaking from the latest monsoon rains storm, we headed to the salsa bar to where unbelievably there were actually people dancing salsa. The only other time in 6 months that people have been actually salsaing was in my first week, so it was kind of ironic to have this happen again in my last week! After dancing with anyone that would have me.. Eri, Julia, Zoe, Carmel, and the south American looking barmaid, who is an excellent dancer, the salsa was replaced with the most random songs. Seth (American) and Zoe (Australian) treated us to a classic dance interpretation of the song 'whip it, whip it real good', whilst I led the finale number - the Y.M.C.A
Saturday was my day of packing and cleaning, though it did not turn out that way, after a very hearty 'Cargo' breakfast I strolled back to my home, and was invited into my neighbour's place (Cafe 43), to have a beer and chat. After an hour or so, and a full washing machine cycle later, I returned to cafe 43 to eat this time, before finally getting into my room to begin packing. Not long afterwards my friend Phuc, from the neighbouring hotel (Phuc An) is outside my home with his motorbike engine running.... Unable to refuse another invitation of drinks, we travelled all of the fifty yards down the road (on the motorbike), before stopping at a local food place on my street. We were joined by the driver of the car from the hotel, and another man. Way too many beers later I had been offered a free ride to my new house in Da Nang by the hotel car driver, as he was taking some guests into the city at the time... bargain!!! I wondered at what point he was going to stop drinking? When asking to use the 'bathroom' at this place I was directed to walk past the old woman washing up the plates I had just used, and into a very poorly concealed urinal... now I know men here will just stop anywhere to pee - day or night you will see some guy with his back to you just 'going for gold'.... but still, I was at a cafe here, I didn't want to be sharing this private moment with my neighbours and their friends, still when in Rome and all that... so I just smiled to anyone that was unfortunate to be looking my way as I managed pass some of the beer from my bladder!
Needless to say I woke up on Sunday with a stinking hangover, and a trip to the bathroom I could have done without... hours later I was finally packed and saying a big farewell to my wonderful wonderful neighbours that have fed me and looked after me for 6 months. (One of them even called me this morning to say good luck for my first day at work...) The taxi driver looked like he had sobered up from the antics of the previous night. On arriving in Da Nang my colleague help med me to unpack, set up Internet, get her spare motorbike fixed and feed me! So here I am in Da Nang City, with a house, a motorbike, a new job in a government hospital, and all of it unplanned for... Life can take some funny turns! The only thing I must say is that I only questioned the decision to move here once - after waiting two hours to boil water for a cup of tea, in a rice maker... this problem is now solved as I bought a kettle today!!! Ok well I also noticed we had a bit of an ant problem, and after my initial attempt to simply sweep them out of the house, the ants fought back, and went into a biting frenzy.. seriously!!! both me & Giang had ant bites!!! I was almost at the point of thinking the house was in an ants nest, rather than the ants nest being in the house, when the ants finally accepted my superior intelligence & big brush! and moved on! Of course they could be plotting their revenge as we speak... but now it's time for bed. Be sure to tune in next week for a very interesting description of life in a hospital here!
Thursday night I took my Therapy Team (Van & Phuong- Physio's and Anh - Translator), to one of the nicer Western restaurants 'Cargo', where as a thank you and goodbye meal. The side of the building we entered on was completely dry, but the other side of the building had a foot of water by it! Finally after months of being taken to local Vietnamese places where I did not know what utensils to use, what food is actually edible, where to throw the bones away, or or what part of an animal's internal organs I was eating, the tables were turned. Now my colleagues were the ones who were not quite sure what to do... the pizza was easy enough to eat, though they needed some coaxing to eat it without the need for fish sauce! The spaghetti perhaps offered the biggest challenge, as we were sharing the dishes, and my colleagues quickly realised their chopsticks were going be of little help to them. They easily mastered the twisting fork method of spaghetti eating, and I was surprised when they refused the desert, because they seemed comfortable.. perhaps it was the rain that had sent the other diners running for cover that suggested it was time to leave. We got back to more familiar surroundings after dinner as we visited a local coffee shop, before the girls drove off into the night on their motorbikes!
So onto the weekend's adventures. My new job begins next week, and my new colleagues were having their monthly lunch together (something that is done here where you celebrate any birthdays that month). I had an invite as did my American physiotherapy colleague _ Virginia and her husband David. 22 of us sat around having a fantastic sea food lunch, whilst we tried to get to know each other better. Everybody was very welcoming and shared their personal histories with me, and of course (as is the system here) I had to discuss why I was not married yet, and how willing people were to find me girlfriend in Vietnam. One of the Doctors - Ms Thuy - told me of a 'concert' she was attending that night, and thought nothing of inviting me along. After lunch my day consisted of relaxing in the coffee shops of Da Nang, with my Ben Elton book - inconceivable - (you should read it, I have not stopped laughing since I began it!). I had agreed to take my colleague Lai back to Hoi An after she had attended a wedding in Da Nang, so as she was still enjoying herself, I took up the invitation to attend this 'concert'. I was instructed to wait at the Institute of Medicine - "a funny place for a concert I thought". The security guard was in no mood for letting me in without an escort but this was no problem once Thuy arrived with her fiance, and her two young nieces. After being escorted up several flights of stairs in the main building, we turned off the main corridor and into an assembly hall. Every seat appeared taken and soon I had 200 smiling faces staring at me as we walked down the middle of the hall, and sat on front row! This turned out to be an early celebration for 'Teachers Day' (Nov 20th) where students, even University students, perform songs and dances of all natures, for their teachers. My host was actually a teacher at this school, hence the invite and the reason for being there. I won't talk too much about the performances of the students, but I must describe the scene a little, as there were several older men, trying to deal with the poor sound system, as one poor boy was left on the stage speechless as his microphone just kept making a terrible sound! The most memorable act had to be that of a group of girls, who not only chose to wear outfits that would not be out of place in any of the UK gay parades, but chose a 'rap' soundtrack that had more swearing in it, than a 50 cents concert! I just was pretty shocked by the swearing in the song, as normally you don't hear any kind of cursing here. I had to conclude that nobody in the audience actually understood the words of the songs! A quick call from my colleague, had me walking out of the hall, again followed by the eyes of 200 people, and a few calls of "hello, where you from?". An hour later and I was back in Hoi An having a beer with my neighbour, after taking Lai home, happy to hear that Liverpool had returned to the top of the Premier League!
My last full Sunday in and around Hoi An was a really nice one. I met my neighbour at 0800 to offer some tuition in English.. UK English ( not Australian English) as I keep making the point there! After some quick breakfast I met another worker, Vi, from the foundation that works at the orphanage here. We enjoyed a local coffee in the unexpected sunshine before returning home to collect my dry washing... washing can take a week to dry in the rainy season! After some sorting at home, in preparation for my move next weekend, I met my Japanese friend again, and we took a drive on a motorbike. (this week's pictures come from the drive around!)
Regards from Vietnam!
So after some recent late night beers in the nearby 'Phuc An Hotel' (excellent hotel with free bicycles... and pool, and it's on my street -this is not shameless advertising...), I had promised I'd go for a little drinking session with the boys out of work hours! So on Saturday, despite me feeling a little tired and ill, I joined the three guys for some rice wine, beer and plenty of food at a local place here in Hoi An. After plenty of funny discussion about why only the men seemed to be out drinking all the time, and several glasses of beer later, I realised we were getting back to home via the motorcycles.... I have to admit that it is very scary to realise how quickly I have stopped condemning the drink drive policy here, I mean people don't see it as an issue, and I don't personally drink a lot and drive a motorcycle... I'm dangerous enough when I'm sober on a motorcycle!
I often joke about the nature of these near suicidal songs (which you can hear around town almost every night), with my neighbours from across the road. I continue to try and find a happy and jolly Vietnamese Karaoke song, that leaves people with the same kind of feeling as a drunken version of the YMCA or TIMEWARP. So far I have only found songs that sound like a Celine Dion number on slow play!!! The search continues!
Despite the motorbike 'incident' I was really thinking about what I could write about for this week's blog, and then, as usual unexpected little events happen that often make me think! This week I just happened to be flicking through the channels on TV, and what did I happen to find... that's right - the cartoon 'Dungeon's & Dragons'. this was a cartoon where a group of young people get transported to a magical world, and basically spend every episode being thwarted by the Evil bad guy, from returning home... I used to get up religiously every Saturday morning to watch this cartoon when I was a kid... the point of mentioning this is to again highlight the Vietnamese dubbing system for TV. These cartoons, and some films will be dubbed with one single (usually female) voice, talking for each ALL the characters.. and this is done with a 3-4 second delay over the original language... the voice also displays no emotion at all, and sounds like the women is bored out of her mind! You almost feel hypnotised by the end the scene, because the voice is so monotone and flat!
Saturday night turned into an unexpected delight because I attended my first real dinner party at Robyn & Pete's house (volunteers with 'Lifestart' foundation), Carmel (nurse for the same organisation), and two of Carmel's Australian friends, who's names completely escape me! They were very funny though and were volunteering in Ha Noi for 6 months. The guy had actually been here during the Vietnam war as a very young medic, and told some very funny stories of how the Australian's tried to prevent their soldiers from getting nasty diseases 'the clap'! Putting little flags on the places where the Vietnamese women had been tested,and the women who had been tested were given cards to prove they were 'safe'.... funnily enough, no-one thought about using condoms for this purpose!
